Wasted Words: Inspired by Jane Austen's Emma (The Austens Book 1) by Staci Hart
Author:Staci Hart [Hart, Staci]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Publisher: Staci Hart Novels
Published: 2016-05-19T00:00:00+00:00
15
CRAZY PANTS
Cam
I GLANCED OVER MY SHOULDER to look at the fridge, contemplating its contents for the hundredth time that night. It may as well have had a bomb in it.
My phone sat on the shelf between the milk and the kimchi, where it had been since Iâd walked in the door. It was for the safety of my budding relationship that I deposited it in its cold quarters, a place where it would be safe from my fingers, which itched even now to check for messages or fire off an awkward text.
Iâd like to tell you Iâm not this neurotic all the time, but it would be a lie. Iâd been thinking about Tyler all day, but I hadnât heard from him at all. I sent him a text, and he didnât respond, and my brain couldnât maintain its chill.
Now, donât look at me like that â I knew he had a crazy day ahead of him, but like Iâd told Tyler â I had an overeactive imagination, and between that and my anxiety about what was going on between us, I was basically a wreck. My thoughts through the day went something like this:
I canât wait to hear from him.
Iâm sure heâs just super busy.
Heâll text any minute now.
Heâs probably dead.
No, heâs definitely in Adrienneâs office, banging her on her gigantic power desk.
Stop being crazy.
I bet heâs been thinking about you like youâve been thinking about him.
Maybe he got in an accident and has amnesia and will never remember kissing you ever again.
So I put my phone in the fridge.
It hadnât really helped. Neither had my book, which was sitting in my lap, ignored.
Iâd like to say I had no idea why I was so twisted up about Tyler, but it would be a lie. It wasnât like I hadnât had boyfriends before, but I usually only dated my equals. Especially after Will. But I told myself again that Tyler was different, and by rule, I should let him in. I trusted him, I really did. But years of working against doing the very thing I found myself doing wasnât doing me any favors.
The scale didnât feel so even when it came to Tyler, and that anxiety Iâd felt with Will was as fresh and tender as it had been that day all those years ago. Because I didnât know if I could handle Tyler leaving me with as much grace as I had Will.
I smiled wryly at myself â Iâd always prided myself on being a chill girlfriend, never needy with my man, not caring if the guy I was dating had plans, but here I found myself, having to hide my phone so I wouldnât obsessively stare at it or worse: send him some crazy-shit message.
I sighed and sank into the couch, fiddling with Tylerâs bracelet, wishing I had someone to talk me down. My best friend was Jane, who I hadnât seen since Christmas. She was so busy these days with two babies under three that she went hard all day and was passed out by nine every night.
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